I'm not feeling very well. I went to therapy today and told P about the memory of witnessing sexual abuse. We went into details, she was asking me questions and I told her everything I remember. It was really hard and all the feelings came back. After the session she told me I could call her anytime if it gets too much for me but I don't think I would do it. I guess I just don't trust her enough. Or I just don't think it would help me to call her. She is not very good at comforting.
I had to go to school after therapy.. it was a bad decision to make an appointment before class. I was not really able to shake off these feelings. I took the long way to school and I even walked part of the way but it didn't really help. I just needed a hug soo bad. I still need one. I can't really name the feeling I have. I just feel like crying. I feel lonely.
I'm going to lie down and relax, cry if I need to and I will be OK. I know this will pass and feeling like this is part of the process. And I'm proud of myself that I let all of it happen.
You should be proud of yourself. What you have done takes great courage and strength. It will pass like you said and I'm glad to see you trying to take care of yourself. (((((((HUGS)))))))
ReplyDeleteAww! This therapist isn't good at comforting? Odd! I'm hugging you from here. Cry and let it out. It's over. Hoping and feeling (actually) that you're a lot happier now!
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