Therapy Today

AAaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh I'm in so much pain! My jaw started hurting about 4 hours ago.. I tried eating ice cream.. chocolate.. nothing helped. OK in all fairness to the ice cream, it worked for about 20 minutes. So now all I can do is trying to distract myself..

Alright, so let me tell you about my day.
I went to see A in the morning. It was just a normal session but then she started asking me about my medication. How long I`ve been taking it, how I feel with it and so on. Then she suggested to stop my medication and see how I feel without it. This time (D suggested that once back in Vienna a few months ago), I like the idea. I am still a little scared because I know how strong they are but I really want to know how I am without. In case that I am not ready to be without them yet, I can start taking them again anyway. So I think it is worth a try. I worked really hard on myself but well I also don't expect to be fine without medication. It might be more difficult for me.. actually I am sure that it will be more difficult for me to make mind shifts and to not fall into the black hole called depression. But on the other hand I learned a lot and I know I have the tools to fight it..
I will make an appointment with the psychiatrist in two weeks, as there are one week of vacations coming, and we'll see.

Another thing that we talked about was my relationships. She told me to think about what the others bring into the relationship and what I am bringing with me. (Not really good English.. but I'm too lazy to get a dictionary...) Anyway so that is what I will do. Not today though, I'm busy enough with my pain..

I'll have a two hour class in about an hour.. and then I'll just lay down and call it a day.